I was shocked, confused, bewildered as I entered Heaven's door, Not by the beauty of it all, Nor the lights, nor its decor. But it was the folks in Heaven who made me sputter and gasp-- the thieves, the liars, the sinners, the alcoholics, and the trash... There stood that kid from seventh grade Who swiped my lunch money twice. Next to him was my old neighbor Who never said anything nice. Herb, who I always thought, would be rotting away in hell, was sitting pretty on cloud nine, Looking incredibly well. I nudged Jesus, "What's the deal? I'd love to hear Your take. How'd all these sinners get up here?" God must've made a mistake. "And why's everyone so quiet, so somber? Please, give me a clue." "Hush, child," said He, "they're all in shock; No one thought they'd be seeing you."