Hi, Amanda.

I have been thinking about possibly returning to the group, for the simple fact of keeping peace in our household and submitting and doing the right thing. I am a believer in God, and believe he is capable of tearing down walls and strongholds. My husband has had some time to think about things now, as I have been out for a while. Has anyone been in a situation where they have returned for the sake of the marriage, even if they don't agree with some of the doctrines. I believe there are many positive aspects to the church as well, and that maybe it is slowly changing in style and nature. Does anyone have an opinion on this? To return to the RF now would be a grave mistake. The RF simply isn't a part of the Christian church, and the 'doctrines' that it teaches are unbiblical and anti-Christian. Quite simply your circumstance isn't a choice of being in a 'mainstream church' versus being in the RF; it's more the case of being in a Christian church versus being in the RF.

It might help to learn that I've engaged with literally scores of people who've been in precisely the same situation as you are now. Some have returned to this or that Revivalist sect for the sake of the marriage/domestic harmony, most (thankfully) haven't. Of the total number I can't recall a single person from the former group who reported that they found lasting peace/happiness in returning to the 'vomit' of Revivalism. Not a one. Of the latter group, however, the majority discovered that God released their partners/families from the bondage of Revivalism in due course; only a minority actually lost their partner to the sect.

Scripture teaches that the Christian God is a god of recovery. It seems from what you've shared that he's 'recovered' you, and that you've 'discovered' him. It would be an immense tragedy were you to turn away from him now by (re)turning to the RF.

God bless,

Ian 

……the majority discovered that God released their partners/families from the bondage of Revivalism in due course; …….

Ian, an interesting statement. So be it, it is God that releases one from the bondage of Revivalism. Makes one wonder why it has taken over 35 years for him to release me, and at 65+ years. Still, I am very thankful he did. 

Ralph.

I think that was the 'murmur' I heard for all the seventeen years I was in Revival. "The boat is turning, but slowly" "Change is coming" "The 'church' is changing and growing", but it's change was always superficial. They can only build on the shaky stuff they've already built and the hierarchy go to great length to keep the franchise familiar. Change isn't coming unless it's another split that rise new knuckleheads with differing ideas into offshoot churches that are predominantly the same ... if you know what I mean by all that. 

Hi Tough_Call,

You are definitely not alone.  There are others and plenty of them.  Currently I know one lady very well and two others who could relate to what you have shared.

In situations of this kind it has always been the Revival way that the church and the remaining member will never be at fault.  Blame for the ensuing marital difficulties will always fall on the one who is out.  After all it was he/she who chose to leave, so no blame can be attributed to anyone but that person.  Brought it all on themselves are some of the comments frequently used.

I'd have little or no faith in the advice your husband is being given by oversight.  They often lack experience and skill and naturally would have to be inclined to bias.  A firm grip on one half of a marriage doesn't indicate favourable changes coming about any time soon either.  More appropriate advice would have been for both you and your husband to receive some professional help from an independent marriage counsellor where, and very importantly, you would be assured of confidentiality!

Marriages do end, too many for any small organisation, expecially one that calls itself Spiritfilled and refer to themselves as "saints".  Some do survive and you can too, with patience and perseverance and perhaps in time both attend a church where the proof of God is seen in the people like you have already experienced.

Harsh, self righteousness and verbal abuse has no place in God's people.  That kind of bullying behaviour is not Christian.  It is very destructive and must be pointed out and stopped.  Do not take it, retreat from it.  Only with love and respect can worthwhile communication be achieved.

I hope I've helped a little.

My prayers are for you and your husband.

Epi