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Date Posted:30/04/2008 12:43 AMCopy HTML

Given that the revivalists conform to their leaders guidelines and practise that very non christian thing of 'shunning' I'm assuming many EX revivalist have had to dismiss or ignore their old family and friends and concentrate on only associating with 'saints' or fellow xians of the 'right' church...

I'm wondering what you did ..what things happened to restore past relationships ...if that was possible and how it felt trying to go back if indeed it was something you choose to do.
If not...why not?

Thanks ..curious

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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:30/04/2008 4:42 AMCopy HTML

Reply to snakechic (29/04/2008 18:43:42).

Given that the revivalists conform to their leaders guidelines and practise that very non christian thing of 'shunning' I'm assuming many EX revivalist have had to dismiss or ignore their old family and friends and concentrate on only associating with 'saints' or fellow xians of the 'right' church...

I'm wondering what you did ..what things happened to restore past relationships ...if that was possible and how it felt trying to go back if indeed it was something you choose to do.
If not...why not?

Thanks ..curious


I think it would be more appropriate if you told us first what you did.
If you never came out of such a situation, what is the reason you are asking this.? :quizzical:
Are you asking this just to find something that fits in with your point of view or are you genuinely seeking the truth about God etc.?

Thanks..curious
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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:30/04/2008 10:36 PMCopy HTML

Reply to brolga (29/04/2008 22:42:59)

I think it would be more appropriate if you told us first  what you did.
If you never came out of such a situation, what is the reason you are asking this.? :quizzical:
Are you asking this just to find something that fits in with your point of view or are you genuinely seeking the truth about God etc.?

Thanks..curious

(Message edited by brolga on 29/04/2008 22:47:03)

Fair enough.
I would certainly write and be open about any experiences I've had with revivalist but in this situation I cannot.  I"m simply not in that  position. If you like...I'm at the 'pointy end' of the stick in this regard, that is why I"m asking for other's points of view or experiences. ie. How was it for you?  My family are members of the Tony Addison tribe - which of course is very sad but its also something I cannot change. I am curious...about the 'what ifs'...what happens to Ex revivalists when its decided by the individual  to establish links to the 'real' world - their family links. I'm sure a lot of people who have family inside these groups would be curious.

Brolga...I completely understand if you don't wish to participate in this thread or answer any questions I or people like myself may have about the 'revivalist' experience.  People are very damaged and I understand that perhaps there is still some 'suspicion' of 'outsiders'.?

but...my question has nothing to do with 'god' and no I'm not seeking that kind of 'truth'......I don't know why you'd bring this up in the context of my question/post.
?
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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:01/05/2008 12:47 AMCopy HTML

Hi Snakey,

for what it's worth- my immediate family are still in the GRC.
Have been successfully "shunned" by them for lots of years now.
I have built bridges with other family members, who I must say have been very understanding and forgiving towards me.
WHY-- because according to the teachings of the GRC, I cut myself off from them for many years.
Now, family (outside my own nuclear family) exists and I have the knowledge that I still have connections and a sense of belonging within the broader context of family.  
The only problem,---- they speak about family members that they think I have knowledge of, but a lot of the time I haven't a clue who they are talking about, because I have been out of the "worldly" family loop for so long.
I now have a book with "tips" on who belongs to who.
The people I feel most "comfortable" around however, are ex GRCers, because of the shared experiences and the fact that people cannot possibly understand "what makes you tick" if they haven't "been there and done that". 

Cheers,
Glad
"Faith is not about everything turning out OK; Faith is about being OK no matter how things turn out."
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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:01/05/2008 3:28 AMCopy HTML

........... People are very damaged and I understand that perhaps there is still some 'suspicion' of 'outsiders'.?

but...my question  has nothing to do with 'god' and no I'm not seeking that kind of 'truth'......I don't know why you'd bring this up in the context of my question/post.
?


(Message edited by snakechic on 30/04/2008 16:39:29)

Snakechic, no probs.
My initial reaction to your signature, George G Smith etc, was more to the defence of the Gospel than to you personally, though one that aligns themselves with such should expect a reaction whether was the nature of the said question or not.
 That is why as "Guest" (forgot to log in) I put 'WRONG' and couldn't  take the comment any further as I had not looked into the "doings" of the Author at the time.
However I expected a comment or two from others on the matter and I couldn't have expressed it any better. I try not make a practice ducking for cover behind others that have more knowledge in matters and is part of reason I have undertaken a course in theology.
As far as your inquiry goes, my situation, GRC etc., has been fairly well shown in past posts and wouldn't bore you with same details now, except to say it was mainly to do with the false doctrine and teaching I finally got out of Revival. Most of the rest was result of my own human frailty. I still have family members attending and even if for their sakes and if I was able to, I wouldn't go back because I would be doing them a great injustice hiding the truth as I see it now and keeping them in bondage.

brolga

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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:01/05/2008 10:34 PMCopy HTML

Brolga
My initial reaction to your signature, George  G Smith etc, was more to the defence of the Gospel  than to you personally, though one that aligns themselves with such should expect a reaction whether was the nature of the said question or not.

Oh really?  Goodness me!? I had no idea...meaning no preconceived idea that people would feel a  need to defend the 'gospel' - a certain biblical stance / interpretation.  There are a lot of non believers in this world so NO definitely NOt....I didn't expect any such thing  I sometimes forget that some  'believers' can be intolerant of other world views - including other 'religious' view points.  I don't feel the need to 'defend' anything so no I don't take it personally.

  That is why as "Guest" (forgot to log in) I put 'WRONG' and  couldn't   take the comment any further as I had not looked into the "doings" of the Author at the time.

Oh okay..?

However I expected a comment or two from others on the matter and I couldn't have expressed it any better. I try not make a practice  ducking for cover behind others that have more knowledge in matters and is part of reason I have undertaken a course in theology.

 Really...I guess you were one expecting a similar reaction. ?
That's your 'truth' I guess?
  Smile


As far as your inquiry goes, my situation, GRC etc., has been fairly well shown in past posts and wouldn't bore you with same details now, except to say it was mainly to do with the false doctrine and teaching I finally got out of Revival. Most of the rest was result of my own human frailty. I still have family members attending and even if for their sakes and if I was able to, I wouldn't go back because I would be doing them a great injustice hiding the truth as I see it now  and keeping them in bondage.

Yes..I guess many people leave behind family and friends - its so sad -the whole  'intolerance' thing
Why do  the revivalist practise this extreme kind of intolerate to  different 'beliefs'? Rhetorical question...thinking out loud....



Ps. competely understand you not wanting to answer /  go over old ground.
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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:01/05/2008 10:53 PMCopy HTML


Hiya Glad
for what it's worth- my immediate family are still in the GRC.
Have been successfully "shunned" by them for lots of years now.

Oh NO..sorry to read that again. When I composed my question I didn't take that into account. I was thinking more from my own experiences.


I have built bridges with other family members, who I must say have been very understanding and forgiving towards me.

Oh that's great...that's probably the kind of situation I'm hoping for. I wondered if the 'old family' the ones 'you' shun are remembered in anyway...and how?


WHY-- because according to the teachings of the GRC, I cut myself off from them for many years.

Yes...I know I have a fair bit of info regarding the GRC branch in Adelaide. I met with Addision a few times etc , and the fact that one part of my extended family were trying to recruit me for ...about 10 yrs before the shit hit the fan.  So yeah ...I'm not without some insight into the workings of the clan.

Now, family (outside my own nuclear family) exists and I have the knowledge that I still have connections and a sense of belonging within the broader context of family.   
The only problem,---- they speak about family members that they think I have knowledge of, but a lot of the time I haven't a clue who they are talking about, because I have been out of the "worldly" family loop for so long.

Oh that's great, must be a tad weird to get to know people who are called 'family' but are strangers. Yeah..Things change.

I now have a book with "tips" on who belongs to who.

hahaha...handy.


The people I feel most "comfortable" around however, are ex GRCers, because of the shared experiences and the fact that people cannot possibly understand  "what makes you tick" if they haven't "been there and done that". 


That would be very comforting - I understand that. One of these days you may feel up to stepping out a little further? I shudder to think what my rello's would be like after so long in the 'clan' ...I think its been awhile now - time flies. It would take a long time to re unite (if that is possible) ? Things change - people change - no doubt about it.

thank you both for your comments.
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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:01/05/2008 11:40 PMCopy HTML

Snakechic,

You would be suprised just how freely they accept you back as you are now. What's that saying? "If you want friends, prove yourself friendly." Works for relatives also.

brolga
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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:02/05/2008 3:11 AMCopy HTML

Reply to brolga (01/05/2008 17:40:54)

Snakechic,

You would be suprised just how freely they accept you back as you are now. What's that saying? "If you want friends, prove yourself friendly." Works for relatives also.

brolga


Are you advocating that people join any one  of the revivalist groups in order to be 'accepted' by some family members and go along with that crazy 'shunning' thing. ?   Okay ..that puts an entirely 'old' bent on things.

What do the revivalist generally teach their members about being 'friendly' to non believers / atheists? 

I think you mis understand the situation. The non member (like me) has nothing to step out of or to reclaim. There is nothing at all for the 'non member'  to be 'accepted back into'.
That's the whole point.  The revivalists  - the person who has done the 'shunning' and who leave their group are  in that  position of being isolated and perhaps have to 'work' to build bridges and  reclaim lost relationships.

Luckily..I would image that for many ex revivalist some non religious family/friends are willing to do that.

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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:02/05/2008 5:54 AMCopy HTML

'chic,
sorry you misunderstood what I was getting at, I thought you where referring to those that wanted to be accepted back by members of family and friends outside of Revival once a person has left.:confused:

brolga
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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:02/05/2008 3:42 PMCopy HTML

Hi there Snakechic!

Hey, gotta say that I like your style. You come across as quite, er....'real'!  You seem to be a straight shooter.  Good to have your voice here!

Your questions are not just valid, but quite central to the purpose of this forum.

My experience very briefly....

Left a RF group about 8 years ago. Still have spouse and 2 kids that go (although she is not blind to a lot of RF nonsense all around her).

There is some friction due to our differing beliefs, but we hold it together quite well nevertheless.  I think there are greater social forces at play than the taught way of acting within the Revvers churches.  I find little 'active shunning' from members, that I still occasionally see due to her still being part of it, although there is at times a certain uncomfortable air being with some members.

I know that shunning has been a large part of the RF culture in the past. But subtley, it has given way to a more human(e) attitude.  I am usually met in a friendly manner.  Not saying that shunning doesn't exist. Officially, they still do promote the 'birds of a feather' type insular existance.  But many members seem to over-ride these archaic practices and be at least civil and pleasant. 

Personally, I feel sorry for anyone that feels the need to try to influence people like myself to return to 'the fold'.  It is a pathetic thing if they do, as it is little more than them trying to prop up their beliefs that their way is the only way.  At times, you can see them trying to steer a normal conversation to some biblical topic like signs of the times.... as though they think I should be quaking in my boots.  I just ignore them, or answer directly, saying it doesn't bother me, or whatever.  Kind of rattles them that I am confidently OK with the status quo.

Cheers!

Dog.
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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:02/05/2008 11:46 PMCopy HTML

I'm wondering what you did ..what things happened to restore past relationships ...if that was possible and how it felt trying to go back if indeed it was something you choose to do.


The other day I was talking to a friend who came out of GRC five years ago and is still very much convicted the need for that type of fellowship. He visited a certain person with whom he had a close relationship at the time of both attending and she wanted him to go back to the "church."
All he had to do was go before the pastor and tell him how wrong he (my friend) was and that he is very sorry and wants to come back.
My friend would litrally have to "grovel" to the pastor and try to prove sincere repentance to be accepted by him (pastor) that he might be able to return to the fold.

brolga
:furious:

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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:03/05/2008 12:58 AMCopy HTML

 I have family and friends still in revival, some are quite recent contacts who are quite happy to talk to me, others are still in the shunning mode (there loss i say).

I have also moved on and created friends within other church circles plus those outside of church/christian circles. Like Glad I find ex rev people easy to relate to as we understand each other, but do not need to be with them 24/7.

Life goes on really.

e5
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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:04/05/2008 7:01 AMCopy HTML

Hey this is Set Free (some of you may not remember me??) using Sea Urchin's login...I can't remember my password anymore coz i haven't been on here for ages.

I don't have any family left in Revival (thank goodness) we've all happily joined healthy churches since and are well and truly on the road to recovery, if not completely recovered from our time in RF. Not having family members there makes it different for me, although I grew up in the church from a baby and was a very active member of the youth group etc. and found it very difficult losing so many close friendships. That said however, the majority of young people in the Revival Fellowship are still quite happy to keep in contact to some degree (although they still gossip behind our backs) but some of them are even still very friendly and are happy to chat or catch up on the odd occasion. Obviously they're defensive of their beliefs and I wouldn't dare trample on their delicate belief system with the truth as I know it would not only destroy the bridge of contact but also just get their backs up and make them dig their heels in even more. I've learnt that the hard way :-s

Advice I can offer to someone on the outside looking in is to just keep loving your family and friends that are sill there. Don't try and tell them they're in a cult coz they'll just hate you for it. All you can really do is love them, do "life" with them and be there for them even when they're not there for you. It's hard but you just have to be the bigger person and put up with listening to their stories of how great "camps" where and how many people have been baptised lately etc. and know that you have to be careful what you say to them.

My thoughts are with all of you that have loved ones still part of these cults. I know how tough it is just having friends in there. I'm just glad my closest friends seem to be less ignorant than the majority of the members of the RF.

Regards
Set Free
Your unfailing love, O Lord, is as vast as the heavens; your faithfulness reaches beyond the clouds. Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains, your justice like the ocean depths.
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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:06/05/2008 9:59 AMCopy HTML

Hi Snakechic,

Interesting topic!

I can only thank God that I stopped believing in the Bible in time to have a beer with my Dad!

I am acutely embarrassed at my treatment of my family and friends for the last 20 years, but they've been very good about it, and haven't said 'I told you so..'

Big girl

 

 

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Re:How did you Rescue your past relationships

Date Posted:07/05/2008 9:31 PMCopy HTML

Big Girl,

I can only thank God that I stopped believing in the Bible in time to have a beer with my Dad!

Really? And pray tell just how did believing in the Bible prevent you from having a beer with your dad, or with anyone else for that matter? Or was it really a case of you believing in the thoroughly unbiblical 'spin' that the GRC superimposed over what the Bible actually teaches? Undecided

Ian
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