Rank:Poster Venti II
Score:8650
Posts:425
Registered:17/01/2005
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Re:Help the Kids
(Date Posted:20/07/2009 19:54:14)
Seguidor,
What I had in mind, and I didn’t make it clear at all, when I opened this thread was not how to treat the “symptom” but to find out what could be the cause of these problems so that it may stop.
There has to be a basic reason why humanity acts the way it does and in understanding that, the problem then may be acted upon.
It seems to me, that there are many reasons why people suffer from depression which is known to have a major roll in suicide. “Bullying,” for instance. Why do people bully others? There has to be a “core” reason for this.
I knew of bullying in "my day" but I never heard of any committing suicide as a result, maybe there was. ???.
I was a victim of bullying myself, but it just seems to have got a lot more violent today.
Maybe some one has first hand experience/ knowledge thy may wish to share, if it is not too painful.
Answers to more of a spiritual problem is what I am seeking.
I have had severe depression since I was 15. It is an interesting journey, particularly for a young person.On my 15th birthday I cried all day because I just wanted to die. A lot of that had to do with bullying. I was a much more timid person then. The boring, poor christian kid who made an easy target. I put up with it right through school, until one day in year 10 when i snapped. I was inthe middle of a group of boys in the year above me. They had poushed me to the ground, they were kicking me and spitting on me and making dog noises. SOmething inside me just gave way. I got away from them, went around tothe back of the building, found half a bricked and pegged it as hard as I could at the ringleaders head. And I connected. Unfortunately he was wearing glasses. He didn't lose an eye, but we all got hauled upt ot he principal's office and the whole sad saga came out. After that day, I never let another person bully me, but plenty have tried.
At home my mother used tob eat the living crap out of me. Once, when I was 15 she emptied a bucket of urine over my head.
Young people with no support often are marginalised, defeated, and they feel there are no answers and they just want the pain to stop. Deep emotional pain hurts more than physical pain. I was treated badly by both my husbands, but I got over the punches in the face much more easily than the emotional abuse. Being made to feel like you have no worth is a horrible thing to feel, especially when there is no one to stand up for you, to help you understand that your worth needs to come from within. For young people, it almost always comes from without.
High school however is just a microcosm of wider society. You put people in a group and they always act the same stupid way. What annoys me is that ANYONE allows the sick pecking order to happen in the first place. Bullies always need to be challenged. I took to screaming at them in the playground, demanding to know who the hell they thought they were to treat other people that way. They soon learned to give me a wide berth. They had nothing to say and were often humiliated in front of their friends.
Depression has many forms. For deep thinkers, existential depression is often a problem. It is a problem of meaning, without which it is hard to find a place of peace. There is reactive depression, which happens due to life circumstances and usually improves over six months. There is dysthymia, which is chronic low grade depression. Thats a mongrel to treat. Clinical depression is the scary one. That is the one that is life threatening. The whole world is grey, and you can never see it as being any other way again. You lose the will to live, to do anything and if you closed your eyes and never had to open them again it would be a merciful release. In that place, you cannot imagine ever feeling any other way.
Pesonally I have been on antidepressants since 1994, and I will always be on them. There is good help out there if you know where to find it. It is hard though to even imagine the depth of pain depressed people feel. It is always important to go for help sooner rather than later. There is also a lot of information on the net about it. The government has started Headspace as an initiative to help young people. They offer support and free or very low cost counselling. Just try to be there for any young person who comes toyou, to help them find the right help. Don't tell them they don't feel what they feel. Love them.
I think that people bully others because they can. A lot of people feel weak and insecure inside and the only way they can counter that is to make other people feel small. And also because people love the darkness rather than the light. I have always felt that Jesus was so much the opposite to that. That he counselled and modelled mercy, justice, kindness and gentleness. The most important thing jesus ever taught me was never to become my abuser. No matter how badly treated I am, I should never, ever treat others the same way. Rather I should pray for them, even though at time it has been through gritted teeth.
(Message edited by Galien On 20/07/2009 19:57:30)
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I know whom I have believed and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day. So there.
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